I am obviously going into Hawk withdrawl, but, enjoy
Whats up man? It's Kaner. I havn't talked to you a lot since the Olympics (by the way how friggin' cool was that shit! and all those BABES-which reminds me, I got a story about Lindsey Vonn, you wont believe it. I wont go into details, but it involves a goalie stick and a midget...ummm...we'll talk about that later, but seriously dude, its crazy).
I remember you said to me "I'll see you in the playoffs" at the end of the gold medal game. Well, guess what, WE WILL SEE EACHOTHER (man, you are smart). Anyways, Buff and I decided we would get together and make a welcome video for you, just so you feel right at home (you remember Buff, right? Well I dont think you ever saw his face, but he was the dude with the big ass who spent a lot of time standing in front of you. You know, number 33.). Anyways, Enjoy!
Thats pretty awesome right, like a racing striped mullet level of cool (dude you gotta check out my new 'do). So cool its almost enough to make a guy cry...and that song is just so damn catchy. I wonder if I can get old man Wirtz to use that when I score, that would be kickin' rad.
Anyways, Buff wanted me to tell you that wasn't really his bare ass in that picture (aren't computers fun?!). he says he wears boxers, not thongs. I saw him come into the locker room the other day with 2 crave cases of Jalepeno sliders, a whole pound of cabbage, and like 8 40s of Old English. When I asked him what he was up to he said "Im cookin up somethin special for Bobby, its gonna be...fragrant". He's pretty thoughtful, that Buff, and a good cook too. Just stay away from his "special" brownies, last time I had one there were some funny pictures of me in a limo that I don't remember being taken.
Alright, later on man, see you on the ice!
PS, Burish said that he wanted you to tell your Grandma that those tests came back negative, so she's all good...he said she would know what that means.
BY the way, I gotta credit CNS (asshole) for the inspiration on this one, and thanks to all you crazy bastards (and bastardettes) for being weird enough to think of/appreciate this shit, just my 20 cents of mediocre comedy, hope its not too terrible after two hours of work. GO HAWKS