May 22nd - Beard of The Day - Kevin Smith
by McClure on May 22, 2010 9:48 PM CDT
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With apologies to
Anywho, today's beard is filmmaker/comic nerd/self-promoter Kevin Smith. Smith rose to fame writing and directing comedies with insanely quick-witted and profane (albeit unrealistic) dialog, comic book adoration, and limited directorial skills. Smith is also a huge hockey fan, and was kicked off of his NHL.com blog he wrote about his hometown Devils for being too profane. When he's tried to venture outside of his ViewAskewniverse of characters, the results have been pretty mixed (Jersey Girl, CopOut, Zack & Miri Make A Porno), but much like The State, those films that he made during my delicate formative (Clerks, Mallrats) years will always be in my own personal canon. Plus, he always manages to work some manner of hockey reference into any of his films, which is a plus.
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Win
Mallrats was a huge win and Dogma was an amazing movie on many levels. I think everyone knew he was done after Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, but now people will pay him to do what he wants, so whatever.
Cheers
Even though he is a Devils fan,
this is a great (Gretzky)ing BOTD. He is through and through a hockey fan, and does promote it in his movies all the time. Plus the roller hockey scene in Clerks reminds me of all the times me and my friends would go down to the tennis courts in town for a few spirited games.
"If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever." - Pat Foley
Section 324: We're on the list.
Huh
I would’ve thought Smtih would’ve been the bigger gun based on the presumed average age of the reader, but no worries. Hope I didn’t screw up something karma-wise by jumping the gun on my offering.
by GenPabloSecobar on May 22, 2010 9:58 PM CDT reply actions
I deleted my effort out of respect
But I can’t get it off the front page though.
by GenPabloSecobar on May 22, 2010 10:12 PM CDT up reply actions
General,
Again, no worries. You didn’t need to take it down out of respect. Basically, Matt Hooper, to me, symbolizes a victory over Great White, and the Hawks are still one win away from doing so in their own respect, that’s why I said “too soon”. Should things go the Hawks’ way tomorrow, don’t be surprised in the least if you see him here again. But sincerest thanks in covering for us while we were all out to lunch (so to speak), it’s greatly appreciated.
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a goddamn shame.
I like to eat
I like to eat, apples and bananas.
by Hi, I'm Bob LeDonne on May 22, 2010 10:02 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
Dogma is by far my favorite of his movies
Bethany: McHenry is pretty far from Jersey, might I ask what brings you guys to Illinois?
Jay: Some fuck named John Hughes.
Bethany: “16 Candles” John Hughes?
Jay: You know him too? That fucking guy. Made this flick “16 Candles” right? Not bad it’s got tits in it, but no bush. Of course Ebert over here don’t give a shit about that stuff cause he’s all in love with this John Hughes guy and rents every one of his movies. Fucking “Breakfast Club” all these stupid kids actually show up to detention, fucking “Weird Science” where this one chick wants to take off her gear and get down, but aw, no she don’t cause it’s a PG movie, and then there’s “Pretty In Pink” which I can’t watch with this tubby muthafucker any more, because everytime we get to the part where the red head hooks up with her dream guy, he starts sobbin’ like a little eight-year-old with a skinned knee and shit. And nothing is worse then watching a fat man weep.
I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out.
- Rodney Dangerfield
I wanna
be the weed connection for Shermer, Illinois.
Dogma is an amazing movie. Fuck, it has Alan Richman, Chris Rock AND George Carlin. I will watch it EVERY time it’s on.
teaching respect for the Indian, one Red Wing fan at a time.
I love whoever decided to actually make Buddy Christ figurines
Watch it with the jinxing!
Time for some thrillin' heroics!
I have one taped to the dash of my plow truck.
aggravates management to no end
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
-Albert Einstein
by tattoodgovtmonkey on May 22, 2010 10:30 PM CDT up reply actions
I had one at my desk at work
until someone complained to HR about it.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."
Yes I did
It’s funny because she thought Dogma was hilarious.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."
You could've claimed religious discrimination.
"If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever." - Pat Foley
Section 324: We're on the list.
by deathmonkey on May 23, 2010 12:17 AM CDT up reply actions
I sort of got even at Christmas time
when I complained about the religious Christmas Carols being played in the office. All I wanted to do was show how silly some of the crap is that HR people have to put up with.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."
I have a big fancy hardbound Koran in my office
anda big study bible & a few other books on my shelves. It is a pretty PC place, but no one will complain about a Koran, so I slide on the rest too.
I wonder if I could get away with a “Buddy Mohammed”?
Confusion will be my epitaph.
by krome on May 23, 2010 9:12 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
This is a Round 1 beard at best
IMO, of course. I mean, I liked Clerks as much as anyone else back in the day but the world’s really moved on from his extremely narrow range of shtick. And for it to follow Walter Sobchak is something of a disgrace.
I respectfully disagree.
Kevin’s movies meant a lot to my generation. He’s top notch in my book.
by Coz_Bulls_Fan on May 22, 2010 10:54 PM CDT up reply actions
Eh
I was 16 when Clerks came out. I’m as part of the Kevin Smith Generation as anyone.
And besides, when you’re talking about “Kevin’s movies,” you’re almost certainly not actually referring to his filmography, you’re referring to – maybe 4 at max – movies, the last of which was made more than a decade ago. Even here, amongst his defenders, no one is talking about how great anything was after Dogma.
And even more besides, I’m not arguing that he’s not a worthy BOTD. I’m simply arguing that we’re up 3-0 in the WCF. It’s time to really bring the BOTD A-game, and I’ve yet to read an argument for Smith better than “he made a handful of movies more than a decade ago that were funny.” I mean, who’s next, John Landis? Let’s be serious.
meh,
In my homer opinion, a hockey loving film maker is not a horrible choice. Kind of like complaining that rain is too wet, it still waters the crops. Ya’ know?
/Note unceasing sarcastic laughter in background.
by burpchelischili on May 22, 2010 11:48 PM CDT up reply actions
Well
I hope the Hawks aren’t as willing to settle tomorrow as the participants on this blog.
(PS – Not actually serious about this. Well, except that Smith is a mediocrity.)
I guess
that some of us just have a greater appreciation for dick and fart jokes. I can say personally I have seen all the movies he has made, and all for the most part are pretty enjoyable.
"If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever." - Pat Foley
Section 324: We're on the list.
by deathmonkey on May 23, 2010 12:18 AM CDT up reply actions
Would this be more to your liking - or too soon?
Well, folks, I want to thank you for being here for the recording of my live comedy album. Funny material and laughter will be dubbed in later.
by ChicagoNativeSon on May 23, 2010 12:57 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
How about we agree to disagree? haha
Granted he made some bombers but you can’t overlook his love for the game. Hell, anyone who get’s kicked off a hockey blog for being too profane is ok by me. Hockey fans are known for their passion. Like McClure said, he worked hockey into his movies. As a hockey fan, you have to respect that.
Some see this as A game, some don’t. To each their own I guess!
by Coz_Bulls_Fan on May 23, 2010 12:16 AM CDT up reply actions
Don't think this was meant to be escalatory...
I mean, Clint Fucking Eastwood was a BOtD in round one, so…
And yes, Kevin Smith has earned the honor.
Rock Over London
Rock on Chicago
Diet Pepsi
Uh-Huh!
by Campbell32 on May 23, 2010 12:17 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
to be fair..
I don’t think we’ve really escalated the beards as the rounds go on… maybe for game days a bit. But for the most part we think of who we’re going to use each day about 15 minutes before we post it.
FIFTEEN MINUTES?
Your work ethic never fails to impress. Seriously. I once put fifteen minutes into prepping for a project. Had to take a nap then before I actually got started!
teaching respect for the Indian, one Red Wing fan at a time.
No game recap makes Homer something something...
And it does not bode well for the next game. I need a game recap to confirm what I saw last night. What happened last night? I don’t know…BECAUSE I LACK A GAME RECAP!
As the affirmative action member of the masthead
I thought I was supposed to double as cheap slave labor in these situations? The front page just looks so sad and empty without a game recap.
Anyway, good choice, I think, but my memory is fuzzy since I haven’t rewatched a Kevin Smith movie since high school.
Just watched Zack and Miri the other night
Not the quality of some of his other shit, but still this is a great and rec’d beard.
The sun never sets on a badass
Gotta admit though,
the Dutch Rudder part is awesome/hilarious.
"If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever." - Pat Foley
Section 324: We're on the list.
by deathmonkey on May 23, 2010 12:19 AM CDT up reply actions
Glad to see at least a BOTD--I was worried our trio had visited Johnsson
and they were never heard from again.
I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.
Totally off topic
But a few weeks ago, molecular gastronomy came up and someone asked me if there was any place in Chicago that had things like agar and powdered lecithin. Well, I just found out that the Spice House (locations in Evanston and in Milwaukee) has a fairly complete selection of the powders used in those preparations (like coffee and armagnac foam or banana and parsley gelee).
And, in case anyone is worried, I’m on vacation until Memorial Day. Here’s to the most overrated underrated director of our time, a man whose public speaking abilities are second to none, and whose hockey acumen has unfortunately been degraded to the point that he actually wants to watch the New Jersey Devils.
Let’s go Hawks!
(170 g) * (3x10^8 m/s)^2 = 1.5x10^16 J
Eh,
can’t fault him for being a homer. Shit, people were saying that kind of stuff about us Hawks fans only a few short years ago.
"If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever." - Pat Foley
Section 324: We're on the list.
by deathmonkey on May 23, 2010 12:20 AM CDT up reply actions
See?
Making fun of meeshak – excellent contribution right there.
by Katherine215 on May 23, 2010 12:28 AM CDT up reply actions
I'm so tired
it’s all one place in my head. I fell asleep while reading the other thread and accidentally Z’d through a bunch of comments.
by Katherine215 on May 23, 2010 12:31 AM CDT up reply actions
How Dare You!
Deign to vacation at a time like this? Are you higher than I thought? Where can you possibly be going? Better not be anywhere in Europe or Mexico, that’s all I have to say. I mean, what can possibly be more important than the the Stanley Cup Playoffs? sniff sniff
Two Words, You Sexy Bitch, You: WYLIE. DUFRESNE. You threw it down. And you got it. If you’re truly for reals serious about molecular gastronomy, look no further than Mr. Dufresne. NYC and SF are the home and hearth of all things molecular and medicated. FYI.
WYLE (sorry sorry sorry!) we are on the subject of all things gastronomical… I have to commend you bitches on how civil you have been to Mr. ZenPop, from San Jose. You didn’t haze him anywhere near as bad as you did moi. I commend you for this. As a ’Hawks fan residing in SF, I can tell you that San Jose will soon go back to doing what it does best: EATING. Hence, Joey Chestnut, the Wiener King.
It would be much too obvious to point out that, a) Cookie Jarvis can suck it; and, b) I always identify with Sonya Thomas, a/k/a “The Black Widow” – 98-pound bratwurst enthusiast, and proclaimed “the leader of the Four Horsemen of the Esophagus”… San Jose must stick to competitive eating and leave hockey well alone. And ZenPop, if you’re out there, in the immortal words of Halifax’s own Sloan, “It’s not the band I hate/it’s their fans…”
I’ll buy you a frozen mango margarita at Puerto Alegre in the Mission anytime that works for you. ;) Open invite to you SCH beer lovers, as well. Go ’Hawks. xxx MG
we have Grant Achatz!
one of my life goals is to eat a meal at Alinea before I die. Actually, it will likely be the LAST meal I eat before I die, just because after that meal I will no longer have any money to live on.
I would recommend the Black Truffle & Kumquat -
I’ll never turn down a kumquat. WC Fields. Can’t help it. Worth every penny. Go street.
Like Wesley Willis. :)
hey now!
what do you have against Mexico?! haha
i live in Mexico and you KNOW you need someone from south of the border to rep the Hawks.
by Coz_Bulls_Fan on May 23, 2010 1:06 AM CDT up reply actions
reply fail again
still to wound up from last night to point and click on the right reply button. haha
by Coz_Bulls_Fan on May 23, 2010 1:06 AM CDT up reply actions
of course
i lost my sarcasm button. i know it’s here somewhere! i think i need VerStigs help.
by Coz_Bulls_Fan on May 23, 2010 1:14 AM CDT up reply actions
Yo bitches, whaddup
Well, folks, I want to thank you for being here for the recording of my live comedy album. Funny material and laughter will be dubbed in later.
by ChicagoNativeSon on May 23, 2010 1:04 AM CDT up reply actions
I was actually just thinking about this conversation
the molecular gastronomy on, yesterday. how odd.
by puppetmasterp on May 23, 2010 9:34 AM CDT up reply actions
Hawks fans in Kansas City?
Looking for a place to watch Game 4 (god forbid a game 5…)
http://www.royalskingdom.blogspot.com
WHAT A CROWD BABY! WHAT A CROWD!
http://www.royalskingdom.blogspot.com
btw, unofficial meetup tomorrow at BL
if anyone’s interested. Definitely puppet, krome, HawkyGuy13 (krome’s son-in-law), & I will be there. There’s a fanpost about it if people want to let us know if you’re coming so we can grab enough tables. I’ll probably try to get there around 130ish. Hope to see someone of you there!
wow that place is an avenue over
from my friend’s place, where I usually stay when I go to NYC. Let me know how it is!
Just gotta throw it out here...
Hugely pro Cop Out.
Exactly what I want from a dumb buddy cop flick. Not quite Tango and Cash in that regard, but still awesome IMO.
Rock Over London
Rock on Chicago
Diet Pepsi
Uh-Huh!
by Campbell32 on May 23, 2010 12:20 AM CDT via mobile reply actions
Wiedeman's call of Buff's goal
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVaViTxrRRQ&feature=related
http://www.royalskingdom.blogspot.com
he's going to lose his voice
I love listening to Wiedeman & Murray…so much better than the Versus announcers. Almost makes me want to get that sports-sync radio that WGN sells.
he lost his voice
last postseason, in the first round, I think. it was painful to listen to, but at the same time, awesome to hear him so hoarse and yet not giving a fuck.
I love that
when the Hawks made a video about Game5 v NSH, they used the radio call for the audio. Even the organIzation knows that Wiedeman & Murray’s radio calls are better than NBC/Vs.
I just swapped out Vs for Wiedeman on that goal for a video in the works
Hossa's Attorney says:
TAKE OFF THOSE CLOWN SHOES OR I WILL SHOOT THIS DOG!
by BigCSouthside on May 23, 2010 1:17 AM CDT up reply actions
the entire playoffs to date
Hossa's Attorney says:
TAKE OFF THOSE CLOWN SHOES OR I WILL SHOOT THIS DOG!
by BigCSouthside on May 23, 2010 1:24 AM CDT up reply actions
Watching a few hours of the Hawks kicking ass is not bad
Plus im starting to like this video editing stuff, I hope I can put this one up soon
Hossa's Attorney says:
TAKE OFF THOSE CLOWN SHOES OR I WILL SHOOT THIS DOG!
by BigCSouthside on May 23, 2010 1:29 AM CDT up reply actions
Most likely
they used the radio because they own the rights. They woul’ve had to pay for NBC audio.
That said, I’m also sure it didn’t break their hearts.
teaching respect for the Indian, one Red Wing fan at a time.
I'm going to bookmark that forever.
I was in the 300 section that day, and some asshole kept standing up in front of me, so I didn’t see all of the play.
Best live sporting event I’ve ever been to.
thank you, I was looking for that
Hossa's Attorney says:
TAKE OFF THOSE CLOWN SHOES OR I WILL SHOOT THIS DOG!
by BigCSouthside on May 23, 2010 1:04 AM CDT up reply actions
I really want to see what you're working on
You’ve been dropping hints for awhile and now I"m really curious.
by Katherine215 on May 23, 2010 10:35 AM CDT up reply actions
They only beat Vancover once, maybe twice in a lifetime.
Still the best hockey video game ever.
I'm not superstitious. I'm just a little stitious.
by AirTrafficAJ on May 23, 2010 2:22 AM CDT up reply actions
Looking back on the highlights from game 3
it was almost like the crowd was in shock after Buff’s game winner. Like 22,000 people had to take a microsecond to realize what just happened.
Then watching Kane’s interview with Kustok it seemed like people had just realized that the Hawks are now ONE WIN from the Stanley Cup finals.
Call me crazy, i know.
http://www.royalskingdom.blogspot.com
Completely OT
But does anybody know of a good video reversing program? All I have is Microsoft Movie Maker, it does what I want, except that. I have tried Video Time reversal, but no joy on getting it to work, format or something is always bad or wrong.
Get off my Land!
ART.I§8-11; AM I-XXVII
James Madison is my Hero!
by Toews-makes-funny-faces on May 23, 2010 7:01 AM CDT reply actions
Dogma is in my top favs list
being raised strict Catholic and then going off to a semi-fundamentalist denomination, it can ve used to see who has a sense of humor about religion
Confusion will be my epitaph.
by krome on May 23, 2010 9:21 AM CDT via mobile reply actions
Dogma is in my tops list too
It came out a year after I went through the annulment process. (Which I think would make a great comedy itself)
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."
Judd Apatow owes Kevin Smith $1100 and two blow jobs a day
considering the way he ripped off Kevin’s esprit d’art.
Occam's Razor keeps the cutting clean.
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