I Sent Your Cheesesteaks, Sam-I-Am (updated)

by ChicagoNativeSon on Jul 12, 2010 1:54 PM CDT

I posted this over at BSH, but I'm sure it will get deleted along with all of the other Cheese-Gate FanPosts. So I present it here for your enjoyment...

As you probably know by now, Sam Fels over at Second City Hockey is raising all hell over the fact that his cheesesteaks have not yet arrived. Now I understand that things get overlooked and that many Philadephia-based organizations find it difficult to deliver in Chicago (e.g., the 2009-10 Philadelphia Flyers). Since I didn't want things to get out-of-hand and I also wanted to give you the benefit of doubt, I checked with a number of Philadelphia area delivery companies to see if I could track the aforementioned cheesesteaks.

As I expected, I was able to track the cheesesteaks departing from Philadelphia from a number of different services, so it is obvious that you have more than made an effort to follow through on your promise. I commend you for that effort. Unfortunately, there was no record of the cheesesteaks actually arriving in Chicago, but through extensive research I was able to discover the plight of each shipment...

I sent your cheesesteaks, it was no sham,

I sent your cheesesteaks, Sam-I-Am...

At first I sent them on a plane...

Then I sent them on a train...

Next I shipped them on a boat,

But that boat just did not float...

I even put them on a truck,

But that fuckin' truck got stuck...

I wheeled them out on a wagon,

I know I did, but you don't have them...

I swear that I don't have them hostage,

I'd rather they gave you artery blockage...

I sent your cheesesteaks, believe me man,

I sent your cheesesteaks, Sam-I-Am!

So if you're understandably having issues with your local delivery services, may I suggest next time using a very reliable Chicago-based one?

BSBCab.png picture by ChicagoNativeSon

As usual, Sam sends his regards and would like to thank you in advance for your cooperation in this matter.

FYI, I will point this out here (which I did not at BSH), the poll below is rigged to take advantage of lazy readers. I don't think they've caught on yet.

Poll

Which city is better?

Chicago is definitely, definitely, far and away, not even close, better than Philly

134 votes

Philly is definitely, definitely, far and away, not even close, not better than Chicago

37 votes

171 votes | Poll has closed

Tweet Comment 46 comments | 17 recs |

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Comments

you have too much time on your hands my friend

i thought it was “Twenny Cent” too

FOR SALE: pair of shoes, red, size 32 1/2 wide. Please direct all bids to Joel Quenneville, Chicago Blackhawks. Clown horn sold seperately. Also for sale: 328 dogs+1 pistol (bargain price for Leafs fans!)

by BigCSouthside on Jul 12, 2010 1:56 PM CDT reply actions

This is pathetic. Why would you spend so much time making something reminding Flyers fans that the BLACKHAWKS ARE 2010 WORLD CHAMPIONS (what gold, Canada)?

by meeshak on Jul 12, 2010 3:32 PM CDT reply actions

I’m being sarcastic, of course. I’m glad you posted this here, but the comments on BSH were priceless.

by meeshak on Jul 12, 2010 3:41 PM CDT up reply actions

Wow.

I bet your “douchtastic bloglord” sent you, his “clueless fucktard/dipshit minions” to troll their blogs. Way to show class SCH. You ruined doubleh’s morning coffee! Very bad!

Have fun sucking for the next ten years, you Marlins of the hockey world. Everyone knows since the Cubs haven’t won anything in over a 100 years, the Hawks won’t either.

by Ban on Jul 12, 2010 3:36 PM CDT reply actions

LOL

I’m pretty sure Phalange meant that in the nicest way!

Lord Stanley's new address: Sweet Home Chicago!

by ChicagoNativeSon on Jul 12, 2010 3:41 PM CDT up reply actions

Sox won in 05

who are these Cubs?

by 815Sox on Jul 13, 2010 7:15 AM CDT up reply actions

I saw a comment on there about the how we will be irrelevant

um, we have kept our core together, which is likely the best in the league
the Sox have a better record than the Phillies, who play in the ’Abysmal" NL
The Cubs do suck, I will give them that
Bears vs Eagles, that might be a toss up
Bulls vs 76ers, yeah Ill go Red and Black all the way on that one

some of those guys got really pissed

by BigCSouthside on Jul 12, 2010 4:12 PM CDT reply actions

This is the best comment I've ever seen.

At the end of the day…
We are from Philly, you are not. We win.

by Ban on Jul 12, 2010 6:06 PM CDT reply actions

Dear lord.

And he was probably serious too.

by BlueVoix on Jul 12, 2010 7:23 PM CDT up reply actions

Chicago’s a horrible place. We have an economy not dependent on the filter-down through Jersey from New York, and a history that doesn’t include getting passed over as the site of our nation’s new capital. We also have Doug Sohn, who independently was a key person in defeating the foie gras ban and keeping liberal food hysteria from overtaking our nation. The fucking animal hater. He likes choking ducks. Cute, innocent ducks.

by meeshak on Jul 12, 2010 11:39 PM CDT up reply actions

and then frying fries in duck fat

delicious delicious duck fat.

by ahnfire on Jul 12, 2010 11:43 PM CDT up reply actions

friday?

by meeshak on Jul 13, 2010 1:32 PM CDT up reply actions

When do we get the

“We have Marian Hossa and you do not” tagline for our site? This reminded me of that.

by VerStig on Jul 12, 2010 11:58 PM CDT up reply actions

Hossa's attorney says:

thats a damn good tagline

by BigCSouthside on Jul 13, 2010 12:07 AM CDT up reply actions

As your attorney

I advise you to rent a very fast car with no top. And you’ll need the cocaine. Tape recorder for special music. Acapulco shirts. Get the hell out of L.A. for at least 48 hours

by GoCubbies34 on Jul 13, 2010 7:32 AM CDT up reply actions

is that you Raoul?

Our Cup.

by 334Rules on Jul 13, 2010 10:27 AM CDT up reply actions

+1

for quoting one of the best movies ever! fear and loathing rocks.

by Coz_Bulls_Fan on Jul 14, 2010 9:17 PM CDT up reply actions

Kopecky says:

“But I carry Marian Hossa’s bags for him so he doesn’t have to!”

RIP Bob Probert
I have witnessed the 2005 World Series championship, Mark Buehrle's perfect game, and the 2010 Chicago Blackhawks Stanley Cup championship in my lifetime.

by chisoxfan1473 on Jul 14, 2010 7:16 PM CDT up reply actions

Ah yes, cause I want to live here:

http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?section=news/crime&id=7535740

"Erin go Braugh". What the fuck does that mean?
It's Irish for "you're fucked".

by whiskeyboy on Jul 13, 2010 1:23 PM CDT up reply actions

link fail

just copy and paste the whole url

"Erin go Braugh". What the fuck does that mean?
It's Irish for "you're fucked".

by whiskeyboy on Jul 13, 2010 1:24 PM CDT up reply actions

Better / Safer there

than the South Side of Chicago.

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."

by cdz3210 on Jul 13, 2010 11:04 PM CDT up reply actions

REC'D!

I hope it’s still on BSH because I wanna read the comments…

But when it was suggested to him that Toews v. Kane seems likely to become a sidebar to every future international hockey tournament, he smiled and said: "I'd like us to win something together, too." -- 2/28/10, so our Captain has said, and so it was done.

(Tweets @ChiBlackhawks and blogs at Blackhawks Down Low.)

by chiblackhawks on Jul 12, 2010 7:30 PM CDT reply actions

Just back from BSH & a trip to Emerg

Doc says if I so much as giggle or cough I could rip all the stitches out. But (oh dear) is it true what everyone’s saying? Are we really gonna suck forever now? Are we really just a bunch of classless dipshits with zero future and a quenchless hunger for cheesesteaks?? Mm, well, I guess I’m okay with that.

2010 Stanley Cup Champions. Booyah.

by Hungryhawk on Jul 12, 2010 7:55 PM CDT reply actions

No we are not

a bunch of classless dipshits with zero future and a quenchless hunger for cheesesteaks

Those type of people are known as Philadelphians.

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene."

by cdz3210 on Jul 12, 2010 9:33 PM CDT up reply actions

The answer to your first two questions can be found here and here .

The answer to your last question can be found here

Backing Backlund for 2010-2011

by ToddtheFox on Jul 12, 2010 9:41 PM CDT up reply actions

Er, hi.

I’m sure the majority of us over here got a pretty good (all things considered) laugh at it, but – ouch. It still stings, and I think it’s understandable if some of us (myself included) are kind of touchy about it.

Cheers.

by ww2b on Jul 12, 2010 9:22 PM CDT reply actions

so....just got done reading the goings-on over at BSH today

wow-wee…..i seemed to have missed a lot. And yet, we all seem to agree on one thing:
CNS has WAAAAYYY too much time on his hands! (fortunately for us)

happy ninja is happy....and wants to share its new toy!

by puppetmasterp on Jul 13, 2010 1:11 AM CDT reply actions

bingo

by BigCSouthside on Jul 13, 2010 1:21 AM CDT up reply actions

case of the Monday's

Must have been a bad Monday in Philly for everyone over at BSH to get their panties in a bunch over something like this. Although I suppose they have reason to be mad, not having won the Cup and all…..

by Steveholt on Jul 13, 2010 9:25 AM CDT reply actions

it could be worse for them

I mean they could have a giant picture of Patrick Kane at the rink they’re using for prospect camp.

Oh….well damn, what are the odds?

by Steveholt on Jul 13, 2010 9:34 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs

Now that is funny

and I swear I didn’t photoshop it!

Lord Stanley's new address: Sweet Home Chicago!

by ChicagoNativeSon on Jul 13, 2010 10:02 AM CDT up reply actions

HAHAHA

That is freaking AWESOME.

by Skags on Jul 13, 2010 12:31 PM CDT up reply actions

You need to post this on BSH

They’ll shit a brick. That’s fucking great.

"Erin go Braugh". What the fuck does that mean?
It's Irish for "you're fucked".

by whiskeyboy on Jul 13, 2010 1:27 PM CDT up reply actions

Please don't

They already have a pretty bad impression of SCH as it is. This came from Puck Daddy anyway…

by VerStig on Jul 13, 2010 1:53 PM CDT up reply actions

agreed

while we may think they were a bit over-sensitive about the cheesesteak thing (and even though a couple of them DID admit they liked the witty-banter comments and the chance to talk about something other than the same rehashed cap n’trade debates again), several of them made it clear they’d rather just be left alone for a while.

i think this would be salt in the fresh wound….

happy ninja is happy....and wants to share its new toy!

by puppetmasterp on Jul 13, 2010 2:34 PM CDT up reply actions

no poking the hornest nest for me

while few things would make me happier than showing them this picture and saying “wtf mate?” I’ll refrain from giving them something else to bitch about….for now.

by Steveholt on Jul 13, 2010 3:39 PM CDT up reply actions

We may not have won the Stanley Cup, but at least our city never killed Kurt Russell’s character from Backdraft (starring Billy FUCKING Baldwin) because of irresponsible practices at a chemical plant. You should all live in shame forever for that atrocity.

Formerly... "You don't have to be sweet, to be good"

by Ed Van Chimp on Jul 13, 2010 5:05 PM CDT reply actions

And yet Kurt still cheered for the NY FUCKING Yankees in the World Series

Philly gets no respect again.

Lord Stanley's new address: Sweet Home Chicago!

by ChicagoNativeSon on Jul 13, 2010 6:46 PM CDT up reply actions

Is he looking at Goldie? I imagine that’s the face everyone makes when they look at Goldie.

by meeshak on Jul 14, 2010 12:17 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs

That's not Goldie

It’s her daughter Kate Hudson (who I believe was dating A-Rod at the time)

How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?

by stacie7 on Jul 14, 2010 4:49 AM CDT up reply actions

rec'd

meeshak funny

June 30, 2010. We will rue this day.

by cliffkoroll on Jul 14, 2010 8:19 AM CDT up reply actions

touche

those were some dark days, fucking chemical plants.

by Steveholt on Jul 13, 2010 7:50 PM CDT up reply actions

a mere rec

seems somehow insufficient

June 30, 2010. We will rue this day.

by cliffkoroll on Jul 13, 2010 6:33 PM CDT reply actions

Man, those BSH guys took this thing way too seriously.

Way too seriously.

Second City Hockey Most Postingest Poster of 2009
NOW STOP IT RIGHT HERE

by mjthor on Jul 14, 2010 8:04 AM CDT reply actions

Leave them alone

They are still looking for the puck!

ART.I§8-11; AM I-XXVII Not a suggestion, but an obligation.
Listen to the wisdom of James Madison!

by Toews-makes-funny-faces on Jul 14, 2010 6:07 PM CDT up reply actions

Hey, Meesa thinksa your polls isa rigged!

But, Philly does suck. I do not know why, but they feel it necessary to scale put models of the Grand Canyon in their road ways. Kinda makes it tough to drive on.

ART.I§8-11; AM I-XXVII Not a suggestion, but an obligation.
Listen to the wisdom of James Madison!

by Toews-makes-funny-faces on Jul 14, 2010 6:07 PM CDT reply actions