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The Crazy Misadventures of Lord Stanley's Cup


I've read a bunch of these stories about the Stanley Cup, and I figured I'd share some of them here.  They are pretty hilarious, and honestly after reading them, I'm amazed that the Cup has survived this long.  The Cup has been lost, stolen, dropped, kicked, burned, gone swimming, been featured at strip clubs,  urinated on, and defecated in.  Luckily, with all the booze that is poured on, or in the Cup, it might be the most sterilized trophy in sports (just ask Teemu Selanne, who reportedly drank 12 bottles of scotch out of it with his buddies)

The Dropkick Stanleys

The Cup didn't always have its guardian angel from the Hockey Hall of Fame to watch over it.  Back when the cup was just literally a cup, it apparently wasn't treated with the reverence that it receives today.  In 1905, the Ottawa Silver Seven won Lord Stanley's punch bowl, and participated in the time honored tradition of going out on the town and boozing it up with their prize.  After what I would assume was an impressive night of hooch consumption, the team decided to try to punt the cup over a canal.  One member drop kicked it into the night, but luckily the canal was frozen.  The Cup was recovered the next day, by I would think some very hung over hockey players.

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believe it or not, this cannot double as a football

 

Lord Stanley's...flower pot?

The next year, the Montreal Wanderers decided it would be a good idea to have a photographer take their picture with the Cup.  When they left, they forgot the Cup, which was briefly stolen, then returned to the photographer, and his mother decided it would be a pretty pot for her flowers.  It served that purpose for a few months before the Wanderers realized they should probably go get it back.

Burn, Baby Burn, Mortgage Inferno

in 1940, the Rangers won it all, and also finished their mortgage for Madison Square Garden.  Management decided to host a little mortgage BBQ with the Cup as the grill.  Reportedly, to put out the flames, the players used what was there at the time, and urinated on the Cup.  For the next generation, the Rangers would not win the Cup, until 1994.  Many Rangers fans site the burning and urination as the source of a curse on the team.  This would also not be the last time that the Cup was used as a toilet.

I got this Trophy that needs some body work...

Speaking of the Rangers, it is widely agreed that Mark Messier has some of the best cup stories.  Mark has a handful of Championship Rings, so he has had a lot of intimate time with Lord Stanley's Beer Mug.  He took it to his favorite strip club, and stated the cup got more attention than the strippers.  Messier also dented the Cup once, and took it to an auto repair shop to get fixed.  I can't imagine walking into an Auto Zone, plopping the Cup down, and saying "can you fix this?".

Stanley is animal friendly

Our very own Edzo allegedly allowed the 94 Kentucky Derby winner to eat out of the Cup, though he denies this ever happened, maybe he was just too drunk to remember.  there have been other stories of players using the Cup as a food dish for their pets.  Subsequently after that year, the Cup got its Hockey Hall of Fame Guardian to keep it out of trouble.

Everybody poops, but not everybody gets to poop in the Cup

Kris Draper of the hated 2008 champs (you know, those assholes from Michigan) wanted to take a picture with his baby sitting in the Cup.  When he put her in there, she promptly dropped a deuce in the bowl.  Draper drank out of it that night.

I Nomini Patri, et Filii, et Spiritu Stanley, Amen

In another kids and the Cup story, Sylvain Lefebvre had his kid baptized in the trophy.  Apparently this has been done more than once

Open Cup surgery

It is a little known fact that you can actually take the Stanley Cup apart.  The bands come off and can be replaced, though for some reason, the HHOF seems to like to keep spelling errors on the Cup.  Phil Bourque heard some rattling when he had the Cup, so he figured he would fix it himself.  When he took the cup apart , he noticed that someone had etched their name on the inside (probably a repairman), so Phil followed suit and etched his name and "enjoy it" on the inside.

Don't forget to pack Stanley's water wings and floaties

The Cup is not a very good swimmer, and has ended up on the bottom of Mario Lemieux and Patrick Roy's pools.  This is currently frowned upon by the Keeper of the Cup, since the Cup was actually broken during Mario's pool party, and had to be temporarily repaired-with duct tape.

Everyone loves popcorn at the movies, but does it taste better out of the Cup?

Marty Brodeur took the Cup to the movies, and let his kids use it as a popcorn bowl.  There is apparently some visible pitting in the silver from all the salt.

There are many more Cup stories out there (the Canadiens left it on the side of a road once, it was briefly stolen from a glass case at the old Chicago Stadium, the thief said he was taking it back to Montreal "where it belongs"), and I'm sure there will be more stories for Stanley after spending the summer hanging out with the likes of Patrick Kane and Adam Burish.

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Lil Jon with his new Pimp Chalice

Cup Trivia

It is actually a punch bowl, bought for the modern equivalent of about $1,000

in 2072, the band containing the 2010 Cup Champs will be retired to the HHOF to make room for future champs, this ensures that the cup does not turn into a 6 foot monstrocity like the Borg-Warner Trophy

Lord Stanley never presented the trophy, or even saw a Stanley Cup game

The way you can identify the Presentation Cup and the Replica Cup is by looking for Basil Pocklington's name in 1984.  If there are Xs over his name, its the real Cup.

The Bruins are actually spelled "Bqstqn" at one point, I don't know how hammered you have to be to think that looks right.  The "Ilanders" and "Leas" also apparently played in the NHL.  The 44-45 Leafs assistant manager Selke had his title abbreviated "ass man" on the Grail (there is also an "Ass Train" on that engraving too, kinda makes you wonder what is going on in Toronto).  

Oldest pro trophy in North America, the oldest international trophy is the America's Cup

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They got Jelly and Buff's names right, but apparently Kris "Vertseeg"

was a member of the 2010 Champs (has since been fixed)

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Kris VERSTEEG! almost looks like it has the exclamation point in this picture

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