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(Mommy, Make It Stop) Morning Links - 9/8

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Sorry, I just didn't have another "mourning links" left in me. Somebody, anybody, drop the puck already and put this Twilight Zone offseason behind us. It's T minus nine days until training camp, ladies and gents. My strategy is to hug my knees to my chest and rock back and forth until I hear an Allen Organ. There's plenty of space in this earthen safe room I hollowed out with a hockey stick beneath my house. All are welcome--even SCUM and 'Nuckleheads. I guess tragedy does bring people together...