Repeat After Me Blues Fans, "Taylor...Hall": Hawks 6 - Dumbasses 3
I take too much joy in writing this, but if this is Davis Payne's (get a first name, fucko) "plan" to reinvigorate the Blues, then St. Louis can worry about the lottery. What a display. Yeah, you go ahead and run around and try and physically intimidate us. We'll take our six goals, two points and go home. I'm sure the mouth breather crowd out there will point to a game like this and say we're not tough enough and we need a heavy. You only need a Cam Janssen if you plan on being down three and four goals a lot. Clearly, the Blues do. The Hawks took the initial storm, dusted themselves off, smiled politely, then went about kicking the Blues ass to Jefferson City.
It's rare on this site that we complain about the refs, which is a good thing. Maybe it's a childhood listening to Tallon and Foley cry bloody murder (before crying for another bloody mary) on every call, but we tend to look other places for talking points than the officiating. But tonight, it was awful. How Jackman didn't get a major, much less any call, for giving the People's Elbow to Kane is beyond me. Was it Weaver who hit Sharp? Yeah, he leaves his feet and charges from Kaufman Stadium, no call. What a joke. And still the Hawks got out of the 1st tied. Oh, and on that 5-on-3 Tkachuk hauled down Madden, but no call there. Whatever. Tkachuk got his, and I sincerely hope he's eating his food through a straw for the next few weeks, twat (I'll regret writing this when he comes back dead in a few hours).
I'm sure Blues fans will scream about the three open nets they missed and the three posts they hit. Well, if you were any good, you wouldn't have missed an open net. Kane missed one too, Kopecky and Keith also hit iron, so that holds no water. Let's be clear, here. I only noticed T.J. Oshie when he got hurt. I only noticed Patrik Berglund when Buff was stripping him of the puck en route to Versteeg's goal. I only noticed David Perron when he was trying to shove Steeg's head through the ice in a scrap like a true man. I only noticed David Backes when he was picking a fight with noted tough guy Jonathan Toews. Did Brad Boyes even play? Erik Johnson continually needed to follow the puck home to see what it eats, such was his lack of control. Other than kicking a puck in, Andy McDonald wasn't anywhere to be found. These were the catalysts for the Blues magical run last year, and these are the guys that new coach Theodore Logan Esquire or whatever the fuck his name is needs to get going now. If he's more worried about the Janssen's and Jackman's and Weaver's, the Blues are utterly and totally fucked. And we'll laugh our asses off.
Sure, Campbell was to blame for McDonald's goal when he got caught too wide. Went and got another one at the other end. Huet looked a bit shaky, but wasn't helped by what looked to be mush of an ice surface. The 4th line was a monster tonight (though Bickell will have to board the shuttle again because Eager assuredly will be suspended for a game for a match penalty that no one can explain). If Tomas Kopecky had completed his hat trick I very well may have shit myself. Hossa was back to being awesome. Toews dropped the gloves to inspire his teammates.
I'm sure someone in the comments will complain about how we act to physical play. I don't know what more the Hawks could have done. They got up, kept coming, and put away an inferior hockey team. You worry about the toughness battles, we real fans will worry about the standings. It's all that matters.
Fuck St. Louis.
Player of The Game
Sharp and Kopecky had two goals each, Buff was everywhere, and Hossa had two points. But when the Hawks needed that kill in the 1st, there was one man responsible for it, and he did it the rest of the night as well. Of course, I'm talking about Catfish:
Oh, I almost forgot the most important part: